Awkward Questions about Jesus

general ramblings...

Well it has begun, and i'm here. Here, being Abergavenny :)

Training was the DREAM. Not gonna lie. Haha...i've met some people who I'm sure i'll know for the rest of my life. They are seriously awesome, and made the whole experience even better. But aside from all the joking and banter, and getting into trouble for noise levels..there was some quality teaching.

One of the main things that stood out to me was about being made in the image of Jesus. I always thought being fully human, was a negative. Like being fully sinful...and in some ways now when I say it, it seems so stupid and obvious. Because in all honesty, being fully human is what we should be aiming for. To be fully what God intended us to be. Completely his child...the way Jesus was. Wow..thats crazy. I had it so skewed in my head. We are all absolutely unique...yet we are made in the image of Jesus. How amazing.

I was also thinking about Church, and what it means to me. We seem to have a lot of choice in our lives. We can have pretty much what we want, whenever we want it. And we seem to apply that to our Christian lives too. We attend a Church, and sometimes, if its not doing exactly what we want or 'need' we stop going, or look elsewhere. If something doesn't instantly deliver what we want, we opt out. This is not to say that we should attend churches where we are deeply unhappy...but rather we need to asses whether the things we dislike in a church are big things, or things that we are just picking on...if that makes sense.

Jesus' prayer in the garden..the night before his crucifixion can kind of tell us about this. He says...'not my will, but yours'..Obviously he was not keen on the whole idea of being sent to die..but he loved his Father enough to do it. He did it for us. Now that is amazing love. So rather than what he can get...he concentrates on what he can give...to his Father...to us.

In some ways, what i'm trying to say is that we could maybe apply thi love to our church fellowships. I'm not suggesting tht we should martyr ourselves or anything, that won't be necessary in this country! But that we think about what we can GIVE...rather than thinking about what we are getting from it. Obviously if it is impacting our spiritual journey, then yes, we need to make a change. But in all honesty, you can't influence anything for the better unless you are involved in some way or have opportunity for impact.

God has given to us so that we may become joyful givers...he gives us his love...we need to pass it on!

And so it begins...

Well its all about to start. As of Tuesday I am going to be a part of the Salvation Army's Essential 1 programme. And in all honesty, i'm petrified! Im completely excited...but at the same time, could not be feeling less comfortable about some things. But in all hoensty thats what I wanted. To be taken out of my comfort zone.

The last few weeks have been pretty tough. Loads of things have happened that i really did not see coming. Some of them absolutely rubbish...but others, truly awesome. I didn't think i'd be able to get the money together for Essential, but yet again God proved to me that if I trust him, he provides. People from the Corps in Inverness have been amazingly generous, and in all honesty I definitely don't deserve that generosity. Their actions have humbled me completely, and showed me just exactly how much things can be turned around and changed if they are in Gods hands completely. So in the most genuine way, I am so thankful to everyone.

My family is going through a bit of a tough time at the moment, but im completely sure that God has it under his control.

But yet again i feel like im leaving it all behind. Leaving people I love again and again! I know that Inverness isn't where I should be...but it seems to get harder everytime I leave. But it will come right in the end.

So anyway, i'm gonna leave it at that...stop rambling. But i will be back...as usual!

Let MY words be few..

You are God in heaven
And here am I on earth
So I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You

And I'll stand in awe of You, Jesus
Yes, I'll stand in awe of You
And I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You

The simplest of all love songs
I want to bring to You
So I'll let my words be few
Jesus, I am so in love with You


This song has been going round and round my head for weeks now. And I am pretty sure the meaning is clear. Stop talking about doing things....just flippin well do them. About time...eh?

So i'm not gonna say anymore....for now!! But i will be back to talking about anything and everything VERY soon!

Them bones, them bones, them DRY bones...emm..i think NOT!

Well well well....its been a crazy few months, and i don't think it's about to get any less crazy! But here goes.

I am finished Uni, and as of next wednesday, I will be a full-on Graduate of Cardiff University. I have never in my life been more chuffed. I feel ready to take on new challenges, and although it scares me completely...it's also the most exciting thing i've ever done in my very sheltered life.
This next year is me trying to take myself out of my comfort zone...to push the boundaries of my faith, and hopefully to put what i believe into some sort of action.
I've always wondered about Christianity. Is it enough to just believe in something? Well i've come to the conclusion that no, its not enough. I was reading something the other day that really prompted my thinking. It said that simply believeing that something is real isn't the end...its our conviction, and passion that makes it useful and worthwhile.
So is my Christian life fulfilling that? Well...No.
So what am I gonna do about it?
It brings me again to the passage in Joshua, where God is telling him to be courageous. He reminds Joshua that whatever happens he will be with him, and won't ever leave him or forget him.

So...sorted. Yes? No? hmmm ok.

Something has been going round and round in my head for a good wee while now...and its started to really irritate me. A couple of months ago, someone said without thinking that they felt we were part of a dying, almost dead Church. Now, anyone who knows me will know that it hurt me like a physical pain to hear those words. The person went on to explain that they felt the Salvation Army was the 'dry bones' that are talked of in Ezekiel. To be totally honest I couldn't disagree more. Yes, thats how any church could end up, but there is no reason it has to be that way!
We are a living, breathing expression of God's love, and we need to remember that!
One thing that has really struck me over the past year, is that we try to put things in boxes, and keep them neat and tidy. We try to keep our faith and God in a neat little box, but in all honesty...God isn't like that. He doesn't fir into a box...in fact, he's so massive...he's bigger than anything we can even imagine. We need to keep going, keep looking for more, and searching for more in God's word. It's not over. We are not reformed people, rather we are constantly reforming, or we should be anyway. Times change...but God doesn't. As Captain James has been saying for the past few weeks we. as Christians should learn and develop as the world goes on around us. Contrary to how it can sometimes feel, Christianity is a living, breathing relationship that needs nourishment. There has to be a distinct difference between 'reformed' and 'reforming'. Revisiting and reworking what has gone before is not a negative thing. Often we're scared to change things in our Church in fear that it won't be in keeping with 'tradition'. But we shouldn't be scared of these changes....because in some ways they are purely cosmetic. Music, technology, and all that stuff...its all important..in its way. But what about our actual theology. Our core beliefs about God. Its important to look at how we define and live out our faith.
I don't know about you, but i really love the idea of a revival. But in all honesty we shouldn't need to be revived. We are alive...definitely not dry bones.
Let's stop trying to force Christianity into a box, and let it expand the way it needs to.

is it a 'Revelation'?

Well...I am one of those people who finds a song in everything, and although I love it most of the time, sometimes it annoys other people! Anyway, in 'Apocalypse Now!' lectures, I seemed to be singing a lot, and I realised that heaps of modern Christian songs have bits of Revelation in them. It became a bit of a thing with me and Collette, and now we find it everywhere! Its very interesting...

Firstly, the Nik and Emma Pears song 'Come, Lord Jesus'..

“Your young men will see visions Lord
And old men they will dream Your dreams
Show wonders in the heavens
And signs upon the earth
We sing Maranatha
Come Lord Jesus come

There’s a time coming Lord
A time when you will return
The Spirit and the Bride say Come
And we sing Maranatha
Come Jesus Come”
This is obviously relating to Revelation chapter 22, which says in verses 17 – 20,

“The Spirit and the bride say, "Come!" And let him who hears say, "Come!" Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life. 18I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book. And if anyone takes words away from this book of prophecy, God will take away from him his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book. He who testifies to these things says, "Yes, I am coming soon." Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.”

The way the song is musically phrased, however, seems to give the words a different slant. It suggests that the spirit and the bride are saying ‘Come, Lord Jesus’ whereas in Revelation they are saying to the whosoever, ‘Come’ and drink the water of life. Although the people are saying "Come" to Jesus, its not the Spirit and the Bride, as the song suggests. The difficulty with putting scriptural references in songs is exactly this. Unless the person writing the music understands the theological implications of the words they are using, it can cause misunderstanding, and misuse of the original context. Revelation 22 is talking about the coming of Jesus, but not in the context it seems to be presented in this song.

Another song which seems to have theology from Revelation in it is ‘Holy, Holy, Holy’ written by Reginald Heber in 1826. It seems to have a developed theology of the Trinity but with its origins in Revelation.

“Holy, holy, holy! Lord God Almighty!
Early in the morning our song shall rise to Thee;
Holy, holy, holy, merciful and mighty!
God in three Persons, blessèd Trinity!

Holy, holy, holy! All the saints adore Thee,
Casting down their golden crowns around the glassy sea;
Cherubim and seraphim falling down before Thee,
Who was, and is, and evermore shall be.
Holy, holy, holy! though the darkness hide Thee,
Though the eye of sinful man Thy glory may not see;
Only Thou art holy; there is none beside Thee,
Perfect in power, in love, and purity.

Holy, holy, holy! Lord God Almighty!
All Thy works shall praise Thy Name, in earth, and sky, and sea;
Holy, holy, holy; merciful and mighty!
God in three Persons, blessèd Trinity!”

The line which says “Cherubim and seraphim falling down before Thee” points towards the Chapter in Revelation which speaks of the Lamb and the Scroll and says, “Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand.” Which speaks of all the angels and heavenly beings, falling down and worshipping the Lamb.
The final verse of the song also continues in the theme of worshipping together. “All Thy works shall praise Thy Name, in earth, and sky, and sea” also finds its origins in Revelation 5. It picks up on verse 13 of chapter 5 which says, “Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, singing.” However, the ideas expressed in this hymn regarding the Trinity could be attributed to this passage, but it is unlikely.

Another song which has blatant Revelation references in it, is:

“There's a place where the streets shine
With the glory of the Lamb.

There's a way we can go there,
We can live there beyond time,

Because of You, Because of You,
Because of Your Love,
Because of Your Blood

No more pain, no more sadness,
No more suffering, no more tears.

No more sin, no more sickness,
No injustice, no more death.

Because of You, Because of You,
Because of Your Love,
Because of Your Blood

All our sins are washed away
And we can live forever.
Now we have this hope,
Because of You.
Oh, we'll see You face to face
And we will dance together
In the city of our God,
Because of You.

There is joy ever-lasting
There is gladness, there is peace.

There is wine ever flowing,
There's a wedding, there's a feast.”

‘There's a place where the streets shine, with the glory of the Lamb.’, can also find its source in Revelation 21:23, which states “The city does not need the sun or the moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and the Lamb is its lamp.”

Later in the same verse there is a line which says, ‘No more pain no more sadness, No injustice, No more death.’ This seems to be mirroring John’s idea from Revelation 21:4, which says “he will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

The lyrics are clearly inspired by Revelation chapter 21 which speaks of the New Jerusalem. It also relates back to Isaiah 65:17 which says “Behold, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind.” The lyrics mirror the idea from Revelation that a new heavens and a new earth will come to pass because of the sacrifice of the Lamb. The ‘holy city’ or ‘New Jerusalem’ will come down from heaven, and the song seems to suggest the same idea. The idea of eternal life through the ’glory of the lamb’ is portrayed in the song. It also seems to contain reference to Revelation 5, which talks of the glory of the Lamb being at the right hand of the one who is on the throne.

It just seems like loads of the references to Revelation are unrealised by most people in the Church. Tt seems clear that Revelation is a scary concept to much of the church, and therefore I don't think people use it, or even realise how present it is in a load of our worship!

In our society it is hard to grasp the idea of Jewish Mysticism, and the visionary culture which John may have lived in and marry it with our very pragmatic attitude to life. At the time that Revelation emerged it would have probably been among many other pieces of the same genre, which would have made it more accessible to the early Church in that period. The fact that Revelation is used incorrectly does not help with making it more accessible to the Church today. The belief that Revelation is a premonition of the events of the last days, or ‘rapture’ leads people to the belief that Revelation is only then “directly relevant only to those people who find themselves living in the days that lead up to the end of the world.” So therefore we discount anything that it has to say, and miss the real message of hope and assurance that John was aiming to give to the Church for every generation. “Revelation seeks to provide the heavenly perspective on the earthly situation.” Although it is unclear whether John had a heavenly vision in the real sense, or whether it was a literary construct he used in order to make his point, the message remains the same. It is John seeing the earth from a visionary perspective in heaven , then returning to try to enlighten the Church as to the future freedom from the persecution they may have been facing at that time. However, Revelation is to be applied to every generation, not just the Church in the time of John.

Geekfest over...for now! :)

I feel like i'm drowning..

So...things are kind of getting difficult. I feel very swamped, and don't quite know what to do about it, or what to say!
I finished all my assignments for uni, and the deadline was on Friday. So it's kinda all over now. And i thought i'd be happy and excited, but i'm not. I'm petrified! Am i doing the right thing? Should i be doing a job that doesn't pay, when i've got all this stupid debt? Is it sensible to sign up to something that prohibits exclusive relationships?
All i seem to be doing is questioning myself, and in some ways questioning God.
We had a discipleship day yesterday in the most beautiful place ever, and it gave me some time to think. I sat in the garden with everyone else, and all i could think about was that i'm normally kind of like Peter. I jump into things with both feet normally, and wade through just winging it until i run into problems. But at the moment, i feel less and less like that. I'm cautious, and anxious and questioning, and i really don't like it. So i sat there, and thought and prayed.
I realised that I wasn't placing enough trust in God. I was relying on myself, and obviously i wasn't getting anywhere! So my aim for the next few weeks (apart from trying to pass exams) is to focus on God, and make sure i'm really listening.

Ramble over...for now :)